Calling the Plain English Campaign…

Just read this fascinating clause on a Microsoft site:

Prepaid codes cannot be consumed or activated if the user has billing violations or their payment instrument is in decline. The user must first remove any violations before utilizing a prepaid code.

What. The. Photon? I mean, seriously. What kind of idiot could confuse that nonsense with English? :crazy:   Shirley[1] even the most deranged Microsoft lawyer must have noticed that the wording used there bears no resemblance whatsoever to the way actual humans whose first, second, third, or for that matter fifteenth, language is English speak or write?

This would seem to be some weird Microsoft conspiracy. The grammar checkers in Word 2008 (Mac) and Word 2003 (Windows) didn’t think there was anything at all wrong with that, which is odd because they normally get quite upset about use of the passive voice, even when it makes sense. Mutter.

For the benefit of anyone confused by the legal nonsense, this is what I think they mean:

We will not allow you to activate a prepaid code for the service if your registered credit card has been declined, or if you owe us any money.

It might need tightening up and clarifying to make sure it covers what it needs to, but I think it’s a bit better.

[1] Don’t call me Shirley, etc

2 thoughts on “Calling the Plain English Campaign…

  1. Les Post author

    I see no Shirelys, and refute any allegations[2] that I might have retrospectively repaired any alleged typos. Though if there had been a Shirely, it might be something to do with Hobbits.

    [2] Have to watch out for allegators

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